Author: Exhibit A

This is my fourth post for Smutathon 2017! It’s also my slightly rushed response to this week’s Kink of the Week prompt…

To learn more about Smutathon, click here – if you’d like to help out with the fundraising effort, go straight to our JustGiving page here!

You want to know the best thing about fingering? From a guy’s perspective, I mean. The best thing about fingering – and there’s a pretty long list of contenders – is that you can do it ANYWHERE. Anywhere. Here are some of the places I’ve fingered Liv recently:

• A crowded Soho bar on a Saturday night, while she chatted casually to a couple of her friends
• Our car, while she was driving
• Our car, while I was driving
• The Eurostar, gently, as she drifted in and out of sleep, making those fucking incredible mm-ing noises as I touched her
• Mid-flight, under a blanket – much better than trying to fuck in a cramped aeroplane toilet
• The cinema. Which film? ALL the films!
• The Northern Line
• The Metropolitan Line
• This could go on for a while…

This is my second post for Smutathon 2017! To learn more about Smutathon, click here – if you’d like to help out with the fundraising effort, go straight to our JustGiving page here!

“Never kiss a Tory!”

That’s right, isn’t it? Never kiss a Tory, not in this political climate, and especially not when they’ve just helped to re-elect (albeit narrowly) a government that has so little regard for the poor, the disabled, the queer, and pretty much anyone who doesn’t look like a cishet, white…Tory.

You can even buy t-shirts proclaiming your purity in that regard. It’s a statement worn as a badge of honour: not only am I very much NOT a Tory, I wouldn’t even consider dirtying my lips with one of the fuckers. That’s how evil they are – they don’t deserve the gift of my body.

And I get it. Physical attraction is great, but most of us want to kiss – or fool around with, or fuck – people we also like and respect, at least on some level. Anyone who identifies as a Tory clearly has a set of priorities and concerns so far removed from those held by most of you reading this post that it can be hard to get your head around why you might want to kiss them, never mind why you would actually go ahead and do it.

On Friday morning, I posted a series of tweets, telling the story of our latest trip to an After Pandora play party:

At @19syllables‘ request, a story…if that’s the right word for it.

— Exhibit A (@EA_unadorned) June 16, 2017

With my work laptop stuck installing endless updates, I was free to cover the evening’s events in a fair amount of detail, and the thread ultimately ran to 43 tweets. I’m not going to rehash them all here, but I do just want to focus a bit more on tweets 2-3 and 30-32 in that thread. Why? Because when @19syllables asked me to ‘tell us a story’, I didn’t just reach for my most recent sex memory – there were other reasons for focusing on that night, and those five tweets kinda sum them up.

Here’s what I wrote:

This is a story about last weekend. About sex that was joyful and uplifting, in a way that we don’t always stop to appreciate at the time. About the kind of sex that nourishes and nurtures the soul – that leaves you replete, brimming, sated…

I feel a surge of utter happiness. I’m happy because I’m having amazing sex with the woman I love, in a room full of people *enjoying* themselves. Everywhere I look, I see joy and pleasure; openness and warmth. There is none of life’s cynicism or meanness here – it’s a perfect bubble. And it’s *fascinating*. Watching other people have sex is such a weird and wonderful thing.